Excuse my soapbox.

"It'll pay off later."
"Just wait and it will all be worth it."

I have heard any number of variations of the above countless times. Frankly, I'm a little sick of it.

Spencer and I started medical school on purpose. We both knew that this is the direction we needed to go. That God wanted us to go. This road is not for everyone. And, yes, I believe (as others who warned us before we started) that if you are not absolutely certain that you should go to medical school (or that your spouse should go), you really shouldn't. However, I also believe that no road is for everyone (except for that of the gospel of Jesus Chris of Latter-day Saints - you can find more about that here and here.). Not everyone should do the same thing with their life. We can't all be doctors. We can't all be mothers. We can't all be mechanics. You get the point.

When we first moved here for Spencer to go to school I was caught in the trap of thinking that this huge sacrifice we were making would all be worth it some day. I worked at surviving each day with our boys until Spencer came home each night. If I could just make it until after the next test: physiology, pharmacology, anatomy, neuroanatomy - oh, how not fun neuroanatomy was. If I could just make it until Sunday, Thanksgiving, Christmas break, (our last ever) Summer break. It wasn't fun to live like that. Sure, there were fun times. I did take a lot of pictures then and I just love all that time I had with the boys. I'm so glad I can look back on it.

I started following a doctor wives blog. It seemed like a safe haven to associate with others going through the same things and to help each other through some hard times. There were definitely some useful things shared there, but I began to realize that it wasn't really a place to be uplifted and helped through the hard times. It started to seem more and more like a place to wallow in misery and for others to either commiserate with you or tell you how what they were experiencing was worse. In all reality, it probably wasn't as bad as I'm describing it, but I didn't feel like it was all that uplifting and I stopped following.

Through other experiences I was having I learned that no matter who you are and what you're experiencing, if you are working hard to live your life in a way that is pleasing to God, you will learn the lessons needed to draw closer to Christ. I was so grateful for this revelation. It gave me a greater understanding of what it means to be brothers and sisters in the gospel. It's not just a common ground for people in the same church; this was something that can truly help me connect with others who are working to always be better and to overcome the natural man.

Everyone experiences challenges. We're supposed to. If the things we're doing aren't challenging, we cannot grow in the ways we need to. And it's okay for things to be hard. And it's okay to complain. Nowhere in the scriptures does it say we can't complain. Yes, we are instructed to put things into perspective, but I can't recall a place where Christ says that we haven't had it as bad as He did, so we have no room to talk. The point is that Christ can truly empathize with whatever it is we are experiencing because He understands how hard it is. If we are truly working to become like Christ, it is for us to respond in a similar way. It's not about one-upping others with how hard our lives are and bemoaning the fact that "no one" can understand unless he/she has been through it. It's about - even if what we have experienced seems "harder" - understanding and offering support to others in hard situations.

My mom reminded me recently of something Elder Neal A. Maxwell said in a BYU devotional years ago: "We must remember that, while the Lord reminded the Prophet Joseph Smith that he had not yet suffered as Job, only the Lord can compare crosses!" (Find the whole speech here.)

This may seem to have ended up in a different place than I began. I think it's connected. If we live our lives complaining about whatever is going on, we're never going to get to the point that "it's all worth it." Quite frankly, if we're living right, there will always be challenges and struggles. That's the only way to become like our Savior. I don't want to sound trite, but I love what Professor Harold Hill says in The Music Man: "You pile up enough tomorrows, and you'll find you've collected a lot of empty yesterdays." That was quoted by President Thomas S. Monson who went on to say: "My brothers and sisters, there is no tomorrow to remember if we don't do something today" (Read his whole speech here.).

I am working hard to enjoy where we are in life. Yes, I know we're in the middle of a long road toward becoming a doctor; we are, however, well on our way in our life as a couple, as a family, and as individuals. I am working to make each day my reward for the hard work I continue to do. I am happy. Life is hard and life is wonderful.

End rant.

Honestly, though, who couldn't enjoy life every day with these wonderful kids?

Saturday before bed.

Today enjoying our beautiful weather.
We miss Benny when he's at school.